Redneck
Medical Terminology
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Anally.........................Occuring
Annualy
Antibody....................Against Everyone.
Artery.........................The
study of paintings.
Bacteria......................Back door to cafeteria.
Bandages...................The
Rolling Stones
Barium.......................What doctors do when patients die.
Benign........................What
you be after you be eight.
Botulism....................Tendency to make mistakes.
Bowel.........................Letters
like A, E, I, O, or U.
Cesarean Section........A district in Rome.
Catscan.......................Searching
for Kitty.
Cauterize.....................Made eye contact with her.
Colic.............................A
sheep dog.
Coma...........................A punctuation mark.
Congenital...................Friendly.
Cortizone.....................The
local courthouse.
D&C.............................Where Washington is.
Dilate............................To
live long.
Diaphram....................A drawing in Geometry.
Enema..........................Not
a friend.
Enteritis........................A penchant for burglary.
ER.................................The
things on your head that you hear with.
Fester............................Quicker
than someone else.
Fetus.............................A character in Gunsmoke.
Fibula............................A
small lie.
Fibrillate........................To
tell lies
Genital..........................Non-Jewish person.
Genes.............................Blue
denim slacks.
G.I. Series......................World Series of military baseball.
Grippe...........................What
you do to a suitcase.
Hangnail.......................What you hang your coat
on.
Hemorrhoid..................A male from outer
space.
Herpes...........................What women
do in the ladies room.
Hormones.....................What
a prostitute does when she doesn't get paid.
ICU...............................Peek-a-boo
Impotent......................Distinguished,
well known.
Inpatient......................Tired
of waiting.
Labor Pain....................Getting hurt at work.
Medical
Staff.................A Doctor's cane.
Menopause...................Button
on a VHS remote control.
Morbid..........................A higher offer.
Minor
Operation..........Somebody else's.
Nitrates.........................Cheaper
than day rates.
Node..............................Was aware of.
Outpatient.....................A
person who has fainted.
Organ Transplant........What
you do with your piano when you move.
Organic........................Church
music.
Pap Smear.....................A fatherhood test.
Paralyze.........................Two
far-fetched stories.
Pathological..................A
reasonable way to go.
Pelvis.............................Second cousin to Elvis.
Pharmacist...................Person
who makes a living dealing in agriculture.
Plaster
Cast...................The drunk roadies backstage at a rock concert.
Platelet...........................A
small plate or platter.
Post Operative...............A letter carrier.
Protein...........................In
favor of young people.
Recovery Room.............Place to do upholstery.
Rectum..........................Damn
near killed him.
Rheumatic.....................Amorous.
Saline.............................Where
you go on your boyfriend's boat.
Scar................................Rolled
tobacco leaf.
Scrotum.........................Small
planet near Uranus.
Secretion........................Hiding something.
Serology.........................Study
of English Knighthood
Seizure...........................Roman emperor.
Surgery..........................A
reason to get an uninterruptible power supply.
Tablet............................A
small table.
Terminal Illness...........Getting sick at the airport.
Testicles........................Found
on an octopus.
Tibia.............................A
small country in North Africa.
Triple Bypass...............Better
than a quarterback sneak.
Tumor..........................An extra pair.
Urine............................Opposite
of you're out.
Vagina.........................Heart
trouble.
Varicose.......................Real Close / Near by.
Vein.............................Conceited.
Vulva..........................Automobile
from Sweden.
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